Sunday, December 11, 2011

My Love/Hate Relationship with Christmas

I love Christmas.
Really, I do. Something about the decorations and the music just put me in the best mood. I love putting up my Christmas tree and decorating it. Lights, ornaments, candy canes, garland.. Bring em on! Sending cards is a pain, but I like getting them. I love finding my loved ones (especially my daughter) the perfect gift. Nothing else like the joy on their faces when they open it and their eyes light up.

I hate Christmas.
It makes me think of everyone I have lost and how much they would love the holiday too. My Mother loved Christmas. It was one of her favorite holidays. Her last Christmas was one of my best memories, though. There is always someone in my family with beef during the holiday season. It manifests itself at Christmas dinner somehow.

I think the holiday season brings out the best and worst in people. Some people see you holding a bunch of things while trying to keep your 4yo from grabbing every candy bar off the shelf and they let you go ahead of them. Want to see the worst? Go shopping on Black Friday. I don't care how long you camp out or how many Mr Olympia security bouncers you have guarding your store. Inside is pure hell. I have had people take things right out of my cart.
It brings out the best and worst in me. The stress always gets to me. It is worth it in the end, but I always end up losing it at least once. This year is no different. I ended up having to make out almost 80 cards! How annoying is that? Just when I thought I was done, a few people I forgot sent me a card and the number seems to be climbing by the day. I'm ready to lose it. I would rather get all my frustrations out before having to deal with the in-laws. They annoy me enough without the added stresses.